tears of mine
Here’s what happened on my first Saturday after arriving in the United States of America. I was waiting for Andrea or Stan to arrive at Sabbath School as I sat out in the hallway of Collegedale Seventh-Day Adventist Church. Just getting ready for Church that morning had been a bit of an ordeal, I had tried on a favorite dress of mine from when I came back from Honduras. But I didn’t know where the shoes for it were and I looked good in it, which is what I was hoping for. The only problem was I didn’t feel comfortable in it. It was a bit different than what I was used to wearing in Tchad. So I changed at the last min to a skirt and shirt.
As I was sitting in the hall thinking the blue prints for the new middle school that the church is building in Collegedale is big and silly, Kristi and Joel camp up. I knew Kristi and Joel before Tchad but Liz had been much better friends. I had spent the last nine months looking at pictures of their wedding on Liz’ screen saver along with lots of other peoples weddings including her sister and brother-in-law, Rachel and Kyle. I had only met Kyle once and that was a long time ago. So it was strange when Kristi and Joel came up and I saw them in person for the first time after staring at pictures knowing they were miles away. It was strange to see Kyle in person (Rachel was in Washington hanging out with Liz) It was also a bit strange being in a little chapel for Sabbath school, the chairs were huge, the tall stained glass windows beautiful and I was new. Stan came in not long after we arrived. It was good to see him again, then Kyle arrived and maybe it’s like seeing a celebrity in person but it was a bit strange. Andrea was a smidgen late (she texted me but I had forgotten how to do all that stuff in the year I was gone and I didn’t even check it or think about checking it), by the time she arrived during the first song I was feeling a bit overwhelmed. We sang two more songs and the last verse of the last song we sang acapella so we could hear all the parts. To be honest I did try to hold back my tears. I bit my lip and looked up at the beautiful stained glass windows. But nothing could stop my feelings of relief, joy, overwhelmed exposure to the “west” and the exhaustion of traveling for days as it all came out in rolling tears. I had to get up and excuse myself to the restroom right in the middle of the song. There was a very sweet older lady who came into the bathroom and offered to help me. I think she understood the tears to be bad tears, tears of hurt. That they were not, they were simply tears that needed to be expressed and released. She was very helpful. She wanted me to use her powder for my nose and lip gloss for my lips to help me feel more presentable after getting puffy eyes and a runny nose. She was a dear. My heart beat had slowed back down again and I was able to go back in to Sabbath School and enjoy the rest of my first Sabbath back home.
As I was sitting in the hall thinking the blue prints for the new middle school that the church is building in Collegedale is big and silly, Kristi and Joel camp up. I knew Kristi and Joel before Tchad but Liz had been much better friends. I had spent the last nine months looking at pictures of their wedding on Liz’ screen saver along with lots of other peoples weddings including her sister and brother-in-law, Rachel and Kyle. I had only met Kyle once and that was a long time ago. So it was strange when Kristi and Joel came up and I saw them in person for the first time after staring at pictures knowing they were miles away. It was strange to see Kyle in person (Rachel was in Washington hanging out with Liz) It was also a bit strange being in a little chapel for Sabbath school, the chairs were huge, the tall stained glass windows beautiful and I was new. Stan came in not long after we arrived. It was good to see him again, then Kyle arrived and maybe it’s like seeing a celebrity in person but it was a bit strange. Andrea was a smidgen late (she texted me but I had forgotten how to do all that stuff in the year I was gone and I didn’t even check it or think about checking it), by the time she arrived during the first song I was feeling a bit overwhelmed. We sang two more songs and the last verse of the last song we sang acapella so we could hear all the parts. To be honest I did try to hold back my tears. I bit my lip and looked up at the beautiful stained glass windows. But nothing could stop my feelings of relief, joy, overwhelmed exposure to the “west” and the exhaustion of traveling for days as it all came out in rolling tears. I had to get up and excuse myself to the restroom right in the middle of the song. There was a very sweet older lady who came into the bathroom and offered to help me. I think she understood the tears to be bad tears, tears of hurt. That they were not, they were simply tears that needed to be expressed and released. She was very helpful. She wanted me to use her powder for my nose and lip gloss for my lips to help me feel more presentable after getting puffy eyes and a runny nose. She was a dear. My heart beat had slowed back down again and I was able to go back in to Sabbath School and enjoy the rest of my first Sabbath back home.
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