what to do.

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I miss Bere. As much as I wanted to go . . . I miss the lifestyle so much. I feel like I'm cheating by having so much. I miss baithing in my dumb bowl and squating to go potty. I miss my famil. I miss the drama of surgeries and life. I miss mowgly and walking home and wistling for him to come. I miss the open air. I miss Hans, Esther and oh I miss Liz. I miss talking to Wendy and cooking at her house. I miss not really caring what I wear. I miss the comfort of scrubs! I miss my TB patients even if I didn't always feel needed, I miss them so much. I don't want to move on and foreget yet, I want to hold on to the knowledge. But what do I do with it? How can I use it? Where will I take it? Trust and wait on God. Sigh. I did learn that didn't I? Yes, I'll wait.

The funny things I do. I have found myself tonight sitting by my open back door with all my inside lights off reading by the sunlight as it fades into the sunset. I find myself not useing my ac at all but instead leaving my window open and my fan on when needed. I find myself not bothering to turn lights on but instead just doing things in the semi dark. I usually care less what I eat and I have no qualms about walking somewhere instead of driving to the other side of campus. Lets not even get started on my bed! It's huge and at first I just took up a small part of it. It has been several weeks before I could come to fully apreciate the beauty of a queen sized bed.

Comments

Andrea said…
I think a big chunk of your heart will always be a missionary of Africa. I know it's all weird here and there are so many changes. Take all the time you need to adjust...but don't lose that chunk of missionary that will always be you.
September 16, 2008 at 7:20 PM
Ansley said…
In my nervousness before departure, it's nice to know the things that you loved about your experience. I'll give Mowgli a big hug for you. And please come over and visit us.
September 18, 2008 at 5:25 AM
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