For Tonight.

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*this is a blog on my thoughts and present feelings. Stories from Germany will come later.*

Tonight I am sitting here by the fire. My tummy is full of heart shaped waffles, homemade apple sauce and blackberry jam and I have walked from Oma and Opa's house to Alexa's parents house in the snow. My heart is full.

I stood on the driveway in the dark and looked up to God in the snowy heavens and smiled up at him. I know I am a perpetual optimist but how could I not be? I realized tonight that I have been living in Europe for the last several months, I am vacationing in Germany and I am doing things I have always wanted to do. It is snowing and while I am warm and full I can not think of scary or troublesome things. So I let my mind wander and it passes by the usual landmarks; where will I work in the future, will I be able to go back to camp, if I do what will it be like? Will I always wander about like a gypsy? These things didn't bother me as usual. I didn't find any concern in them because God is with me in the snow, the cold and the uncertain times. I am living in places most people only dream about and I am visiting countries most people only read about. Sure I'd like the life forecast but I understand for the time being that God is only asking me to stand in the awe of his Glory and look up at the snow.

I think eating great waffles helps but I am more sure that being content with where I am and trusting God completely is what makes this part so nice. I hope to hold on to this feeling when I am back in the trenches and the snow won't stop and and I want spring and I feel like a nomad without a real resting place. But I will look back to tonight and in my mind it will wander back to this place and I will feel the cold snow on my face and the warmth in my heart.

Comments

Andrea said…
Contentedness is the best gift you can have for the holidays. May you hold onto it.
December 29, 2009 at 2:17 PM
kessia reyne said…
Yeah, hold on to that feeling, you eternal optimist, you! And yeah, those heart-shaped waffles sound amazing...
December 29, 2009 at 4:30 PM
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